


Conscience

by MeganRosenberg



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII (Video Game 1997), Final Fantasy VII Remake (Video Game 2020)
Genre: Alcohol, Brotherly Love, Brothers, Child Neglect, Drinking, Drunk Reno, Drunken Flirting, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotions, Excessive Drinking, Feelings, Friendship, Gen, Guilt, Male Friendship, POV Rude, POV Third Person, Past Child Abuse, Reno (Compilation of FFVII)-centric, Reno - Freeform, Reno and Rude - Freeform, Rude - Freeform, Rude of the Turks, Shinra, Shinra Company, Turks - Freeform, clingy reno, drunk, friends - Freeform, needy reno, reno of the turks, sad reno, snuggles, supportive rude, wet clothes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-17 06:00:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28720122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MeganRosenberg/pseuds/MeganRosenberg
Summary: Rude takes care of drunk-Reno, who is way more emotional than he has any right to be.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 15





	Conscience

xxxxxx

“These stairs’re really steep, Partner.” Reno laughed as he twisted himself around to face his partner and tripped half-backwards down the hallway leading toward Rude’s apartment.

Rude exhaled a tired breath, catching Reno with one hand around his upper arm and one against his back, narrowly rescuing the smaller man from falling backwards onto the floor. “You’re walking on flat ground right now, Reno. We took the elevator.” Rude reminded him.

“Whaaaat?” Reno looked around with huge eyes, as though completely lost as Rude dragged him back up to his feet. “No shit, man?” He frowned, staring at Rude with furrowed brows. “We’re in an elevator right now?” He pouted, looking around the hallway with a skeptical frown.

Rude shook his head. Why the hell did Reno let himself get this drunk? They had work in the morning. They’d be waking up for work in like four or five hours even. 

They were supposed to go out for a drink, maybe two or three if they really wanted to go overboard, and Rude had hoped to be home and in bed at least two or three hours ago. That wasn’t how the night went at all. Well after Tseng went home, Reno was still going at it, accepting free drinks from some strange girl across the bar, chatting up the bartender… He was even, perhaps unintentionally, flirting with a random guy who sat next to them. 

The whole thing was such a mess, and Reno simply wouldn’t agree to go home. Even when Rude tried to drag him away from the bar, he got defensive, almost angry… So Rude sat through another hour or so of the awkward, increasingly uncomfortable situation. Rude didn’t want to leave him at the pub alone, so he stuck around, unable to convince his partner to go home until about twenty minutes ago. Reno must have had at least eight drinks by the end of the night, maybe as many as ten or twelve.

Most of Rude was annoyed that he had to either keep watch over the younger man all night or send him home on his own and end up staying up worrying about him all night instead… a small part of him was almost concerned though with why his partner’s behavior had taken this turn. Reno didn’t usually drink to excess. He drank, sure, but wasn’t an over-indulgent, messy drunk. It was strange to see him so out of it, especially on a work night.

“Where are we going?” Reno giggled, reaching up toward Rude’s ear and tapping one of his earrings. “Why do you have so many of these!?” He added, doubling forward in a small fit of undeserved laughter.

Rude continued pulling his partner along, practically dragging the younger man. Reno wasn’t doing much to help himself walk here.

“We goin’ to that good diner with th’ pie?” Reno wondered, stumbling after Rude as the taller man led him into his apartment and toward his couch. “Could go for th’ blueberry ‘bout now… Maybe you get cherry an’ we’ll split ‘em half and half…” He suggested. “Don’ want that fuckin’ apple though. Not as good as ev’rybody says.”

“We’re not going anywhere. We've been out long enough. You have work tomorrow, Reno. Now you’re going to sleep this off. And I doubt you’ll be as eager to get up early for pie in the morning.” Rude frowned as he pushed Reno gently onto the couch. “Stay here. I’ll go get you some pillows and blankets.”

“We makin’ a fort or somethin’?” Reno smirked, standing up and stumbling after Rude, tripping over his own feet and catching himself on Rude's arm. "Used to fuck around and make forts out'a pillows and couch cushions an' shit as a kid when my parents weren't watchin' me. You know, when they'd like leave for the day an' not come back 'til night? You ever do that?"

“Reno. Please stay on the couch.” Rude breathed, turning back toward his partner and putting a hand lightly against the smaller man’s collar, pushing him back toward the sofa gently, but firmly. 

Reno shook his head no. “Don’t wanna…” He slurred, trying to walk even while Rude was holding him back. “I gotta… Lemme go, man…” He grumbled, his shoulders slumping as he grabbed toward Rude’s hands with fumbling fingers. 

“No, Reno. I’m getting you some blankets. So you can sleep. Sit down. Stay here.” Rude ordered, his voice serious as usual. “I don’t want you wandering around, falling, breaking things… Just stay.”

“Huh uh.” Reno shook his head again. “God damn, Rude… I just gotta piss. Let me go... Gotta piss, man. Damn.” Reno scoffed, shrugging away from Rude’s touch and stumbling toward the bathroom.

Rude rolled his eyes and headed toward his linen closet, selecting a spare blanket, then making his way into his bedroom, grabbing one of his two pillows off of his bed and heading back into the living room.

His partner wasn’t back from the bathroom yet. Hopefully that’s where he really went. Hopefully he was doing okay in there, but Rude wasn’t about to go in there and help the younger man piss. Surely Reno could do that much on his own.

So he placed the blanket and pillow on the end of the couch and headed into the kitchen, getting himself a glass of water and drinking most of it, then filling a second one up for Reno. The younger man probably needed to drink something that wasn’t alcohol to prevent the worst hangover ever in the morning.

Making his way back to the couch, Rude placed the glass of water on the coffee table and looked up toward the bathroom door, which was only halfway closed.

“Reno?” Rude called out, frowning when he heard the sound of running water, followed by a sharp gasp and a thudding sound. “Damn it…” Rude grumbled, picking up his pace and heading toward the bathroom. The falling water wasn’t from the sink, nor the toilet. It was the shower. And the thud was probably Reno tripping himself up and falling.

“Reno, what are you doing-” Rude spoke again as he opened the bathroom door. Sure enough, the red-haired man was in the shower, with the curtain open. He was sitting in the corner, still fully dressed, with his knees pulled halfway up to his chest. Water poured down onto him and he looked like he was about three seconds away from crying. 

“Partner… You okay?” Rude exhaled, turning the water off and squatting in front of his friend. Sure enough Reno did have the start of tears in his eyes. Damp clumps of hair hung over his face and he was shivering.

With a frown, Rude reached out toward his friend, brushing some of his hair away from his eyes, wincing inwardly when he felt how cold the damp hair was. Reno had turned on the cold water rather than the warm, as if getting into the shower fully-clothed wasn’t messy enough without giving himself hypothermia. 

Rude exhaled again. “We’ve got to get you some dry clothes…” He noted. “Reno… you’re freezing.” He frowned, putting his hands on Reno’s arms. “Pull yourself together, man… This is gonna be a long night for both of us if you don’t just settle down…”

Reno shook his head, grabbing toward Rude’s shirt before the other man could stand back up. “I gotta tell you somethin’, man…” He whispered, his eyes wide, dark, practically fearful.

“Alright…” Rude frowned. “Go ahead.”

Reno shook his head. “It’s a big thing, Rude…” He whimpered. “Secret I’ve been keepin’ for a long time. I don’t talk about this to just anybody... It’s really fuckin’ upsetting… I don’ think most people know what it’s like, Rude...” He whispered, tears shining in his eyes.

Rude furrowed his brows, wondering what it could possibly be, but also not forgetting that Reno was very intoxicated right now. He wanted to take it seriously, but at the same time, he wondered if Reno was going to confess that he was drunk or something else stupid and obvious. 

“I did something horrible…” Reno whispered, biting his trembling lower lip and closing his eyes. His eyebrows knitted together almost like they would have if he were in pain.

“What is it, Partner?” Rude asked, using the most gentle voice he could manage as he placed a hand gently on Reno’s arm. “What did you do?” 

“Rude…” Reno whispered, trying to lean upward as Rude bent down further. “Rude…” Reno put his hand against the back of Rude’s neck, pulling him down closer. “Rude, I killed someone…” He choked, letting go of Rude’s neck and using his hand to cover his eyes as he choked out a small sob.

Frowning, Rude stared down at his partner. “Who? When?” He asked. How had this happened without Rude knowing about it? Things had been so calm at work.

Shaking his head as he stared up with huge eyes brimming with tears, Reno answered in a small voice. “Lotsa people. It’s my job, Rude…” He whimpered. “I kill people all the time.”

Rude couldn’t help but to let out a soft laugh. “God damn it, Reno…” He shook his head. “Yes… We do have to kill people sometimes. I know this… I’m usually right there next to you when we have to take someone out.”

“I’ve killed so many people…” Reno whimpered.

Rude paused, inhaling a small breath and licking his lips. Maybe Reno was more bothered by their work than he usually let on. Maybe being drunk was making him honest about something that really bothered him but which he usually ignored, hid, pushed down.

Reno choked out another soft sob and looked down, hiding his face behind his hands.

“Reno…” Rude frowned, gripping his partner’s wrists gently, pulling his hands down so he could see the younger man’s face. “Are you bothered by what we do?” He asked. 

Reno’s eyes shined with tears and he still wore an almost pained expression on his face. “I dunno… Killin’ people’s a big deal, man… Do we gotta do that?” He whispered.

“Maybe we could talk to Tseng and see if we can try not to get involved in cases that are leading that direction… We might not be able to get out of it completely, but perhaps spare ourselves some of it at least?” Rude suggested. He never realized this aspect of their job was weighing so heavily on his partner’s mind. Reno seemed almost giddy about killing people half the time.

Shrugging and sticking his lower lip out in a pout, Reno stared back up at his partner, then looked down at himself, pinching the front of his shirt between two fingers and exhaling a shaky breath. “I’m all wet…” He whimpered, his voice shaking with tears. “It’s so cold…”

Rude blinked. Maybe Reno was just going to be upset by anything and everything tonight. If he was just as upset about having killed people as he was about being soaked, perhaps none of it was as big of a deal as he was making into in this moment.

“Am I at my house?” Reno asked, looking around himself as though confused.

“No.” Rude shook his head. “You’re at mine.”

Groaning an exaggerated exhale, Reno leaned back in the shower as far as he could, bumping the back of his head against the wall and groaning. “Ow…” He whined, reaching up with one hand and touching the back of his head. He stuck out his lip in a pout and looked back up at Rude. “I don’t feel good.” He complained.

Rude shook his head. “I’m sure you don’t. You drank your weight in liquor tonight.” He reminded his partner. 

“Uggh…” Reno groaned, drawing his knees up closer to his chest and laying his forehead on them. “Why do I feel so much like shit?” He moaned.

“You think you might throw up?” Rude wondered, glancing toward the small trash can on the other side of the room. Maybe it would be worthwhile to bring it over just in case… “I can get you the trash can…”

“No.” Reno shook his head, closing his eyes and leaning his head back again, this time at least not smacking it against the wall quite so hard as before. “I think I need to take a nap, Partner… Feel like fuckin’ hell… Just let me take a nap…” He requested, shivering lightly, but not seeming too bothered by it. He seemed content to sleep here in the bottom of the shower, soaking wet.

Rude breathed out a small breath, then inhaled a calming one and started to stand. “Can you stay here for a minute then?” He asked. “I’ll go get you some dry clothes. Will you stay here until I get back? We’ll get you dressed in something dry. Then you can take that nap. Alright?”

Reno nodded, closing his eyes and draping one of his arms over his face.

Rude breathed out another frustrated breath as he pulled himself up to his feet and headed back toward his bed room. Reno was just going to be sleeping, so a t-shirt, boxer shorts, and socks would suffice. Maybe in the morning Reno could get his clothing he’d worn tonight washed and dried and he could wear it to work again tomorrow. Rude supposed he could clean it, do his partner a favor he hadn’t really earned, which might just be enabling this behavior… but he felt almost guilty not helping the man out.

Collecting the clothing, Rude closed his dresser drawer and headed back toward the bathroom. He hoped Reno would get over the annoying part of this and pass out soon. The idea of staying up all night babysitting while Reno cried about whatever topic happened to enter his mind didn’t seem appealing.

When Rude made it back to his partner, his heart immediately sank. Reno had crawled out of the bath tub and over to the toilet. He was half-laying on the floor, gripping the toilet seat in his hands as he leaned over it. He looked like he was about four seconds away from throwing up.

With a grimace and a short breath, Rude jogged over, tossing the clothing to the side, then kneeling down next to his friend and pulling his hair back with his hand just in time.

Reno’s retching sounded particularly breathless and painful as Rude had no other choice but to wait it out, gently patting Reno’s back with one hand while he kept his hair safely behind him with the other.

Reno’s breaths were shaky as he choked up whatever he’d eaten tonight - but it seemed to mostly be liquid - he drank a lot this evening. Rude didn’t even remember the younger man ordering food.

“You done?” Rude spoke when there was a long pause after his last fit of rather painful-sounding dry heaving. “You get it all out, Partner?” Rude asked, his voice low and calm as he rubbed a hand lightly over his partner’s back.

Reno nodded, sniffing back tears as he leaned back, reaching with a fumbling hand toward the flusher, but missing, then settling for crawling on the floor toward the wall. He put his back against it and leaned his head back, closing his eyes and exhaling a shaky breath.

Rude shook his head, flushing the toilet for his partner, then grabbing a hand-towel off the side of the sink and squatting down next to Reno.

Choosing not to be disgusted - or rather to push down his disgust - Rude brought the towel up to his partner’s lips, dabbing away a bit of vomit from his mouth and chin. He tossed the towel to the side, then grabbed a glass off the sink, filled it with water, and handed it to Reno.

“Rinse your mouth out.” He suggested.

Reno took the glass, gulping some into his mouth and swallowing it.

Rude shook his head, taking the glass back. He’d intended for his partner to swish it around and spit it out, but he supposed that worked... 

“Brought you some clothes.” Rude noted, nodding toward the pile he’d thrown onto the side of the sink. “Think you can handle getting changed on your own?” He frowned.

Reno blinked a few times, but nodded, dragging himself up onto shaky legs.

Rude grimaced, holding onto Reno’s arm near his elbow until the younger man seemed to have balanced himself better.

“I’ll wait in the hall, okay?” Rude nodded, taking a cautious step back, letting go of Reno’s arm, but looking at him carefully, ready to reach out and grab him again if he started to fall. Maybe leaving the man to do this task on his own wasn’t a great idea... He could just picture in his mind Reno trying to take off or put on his pants, tripping himself, falling and smacking his head on the wall or the floor...

“Do I gotta take off m’shoes?” Reno blinked, his eyelids looking heavy.

“Yeah…” Rude stared. He hoped Reno hadn’t drank enough that it was dangerous. The vomiting was a good sign though. He got some of it out of his system at least.

Reno bent down as though in an attempt to remove his shoes, only to trip forward, catching himself on Rude’s arm. “I don’t think I can do it…” He breathed, sinking back down to the floor with an exaggerated whimper. “I’m gonna be wet all night…” He choked, overly-dramatic tears welling up in his eyes again.

Rude shook his head. “No need to get upset. I can help you. Let’s get your shirt first.” He offered, reaching down and helping Reno pull his shirt up over his head. He grabbed a clean towel off the rack and hung it around Reno’s shoulders, using one end of it to dry his partner’s hair a bit.

Reno continued shivering as he reached an uncoordinated hand up toward Rude’s, gripping both the towel and a few of Rude’s fingers as he sort of tried to help dry his hair.

Frowning, Rude bent forward and stared into Reno’s eyes. Reno stared back, looking a mixture of dizzy, scared, and upset. Why was he such an emotional drunk tonight? Why was this so messy? Why’d he let himself get this far? Normally Reno drank enough, but not too much. He’d get more vulgar than he already was, maybe more angry… but not this emotional. Never.

“Reno, you okay?” Rude finally asked. “Something’s bothering you…” He guessed. He wasn’t sure his partner would be able to articulate an answer right now, but he probably wouldn’t be willing to talk later, when he was sober. If he wanted an explanation for this behavior, it was likely now or never.

Reno shrugged and shook his head, looking down. “Just… not sure about killin’ people no more…” He whispered.

Rude blinked a few times. Reno had never, ever since the time he and Rude partnered up, expressed that he had any issue killing people. They were people who needed to die - people who were in the way, people who were up to shady things that put Shinra at risk. Reno never seemed to care before.

“My mom an’ dad kinda disappeared when I was young.” Reno noted, his voice small. “Maybe Shinra had them killed.” He guessed with a shrug. “Maybe we’ve been killin’ people’s moms and dads…?” He looked up with a trembling lip and tears in his eyes.

Rude stared back at Reno, helping him into his spare t-shirt. They didn’t just go murder mothers and fathers at home playing with their kids. They killed people who were dangerous, who would kill them first otherwise. Terrorists, drug peddlers, murderers, thieves…

“We’re careful when we have to do things like that, Reno. It’s a last resort… We haven’t killed that many people, and they’re people whose kids’ll probably be better off with someone else.” Rude reminded his partner. 

“Am I better off?” Reno whispered, blinking dark, tearful eyes up at his partner.

Rude shook his head. He wasn’t sure what Reno’s parents were like when they got killed, if they even did get killed. And if they did, he didn’t know if it was Shinra. “I think you turned out great.” Rude finally noted, running a hand through Reno’s hair, then resting it on the back of his head and pulling him into a hug.

Reno leaned into the hug, resting his cheek against Rude’s chest for a moment.

“Let’s get some dry shorts on you.” Rude spoke up, pulling out of the embrace and helping Reno to his feet.

“Don’ look at my dick…” Reno slurred, pulling at his pants with one hand and holding onto Rude with the other. “Y’ bald pervert…” He added, rubbing a hand across the back of Rude’s head.

Rude shook his head, swatting Reno’s hand away. “Stop getting so plastered you can’t stand up without help and soaking your clothes in the shower and I wouldn’t need to accidentally see your dick.” He countered. “Trust me, I’d rather you get dressed on your own.”

Reno laughed softly, struggling to get his pants down using only one hand, pulling only at the side over one thigh. The wet fabric clung to his skin. It was clear Reno wasn’t going to be able to get the garment off on his own. He groaned in frustration and wobbled on his unsteady feet. “Fuckin’ things’re stuck…” He grumbled.

Without having to be asked, Rude reached down with his free hand to help Reno shimmy out of the material. The younger Turk kicked off his shoes and socks while doing this, then Rude grabbed up the dry shorts and waited for Reno to step into them.

“Are these your underwear, Partner?” Reno frowned, pulling the shorts up and snapping the elastic around his waist. “They’re too big…” He pouted.

“They’re dry.” Rude reminded him. “It’s this or nothing.”

“You wan’ me to wear nothing?” Reno smirked, leaning toward Rude and shoving against his chest, but only succeeding in knocking himself slightly backward instead of budging his partner even an inch.

“No. I want you to wear these.” Rude stared, catching Reno by his arm before his back could hit the wall and steadying him back on his feet. “Got you some socks too, but we’ll get you settled on the couch first.” He ordered. He wasn’t about to try to wrestle socks on Reno’s feet until the younger man was sitting or lying down.

Reno closed his eyes, but nodded as he leaned his head against Rude’s shoulder and let the man lead him back into the living room.

“Sit.” Rude instructed, gently pushing Reno toward the couch, then handing him one of the socks and sliding the other onto Reno’s foot for him. He then watched with furrowed brows as Reno struggled with the second one. “I’ve got it.” Rude noted, reaching down and straightening it for him.

“Thanks.” Reno smiled, reaching a hand out and running his fingertips over Rude’s wrist. “Will you stay here with me? I don’t wanna be by myself...”

Rude frowned as he looked into his partner’s eyes again. Reno was being so oddly clingy. He wondered if something came up tonight that reminded him of his parents, of the fact that they disappeared on him. All of this emotion was so out of character for the young man.

“Just stay until I fall asleep?” Reno asked, sticking his lip out in a pout.

Rude nodded, then sat down on the couch, placing the pillow on his lap and letting Reno lay his head down on it. It occurred to Rude now as he watched his partner settle down that he never really asked Reno too much about his childhood. Maybe there was some sort of trauma there, buried deep, only coming out now that Reno didn’t have his guard up so high.

“Were you close with your parents?” Rude asked simply, placing his hand lightly against the pillow next to Reno’s head, lightly running a few of the shorter strands of Reno’s hair between his fingers.

Reno blinked a few times as he stared back, then shrugged. “No… They were into some shady shit, I think. I hardly remember them, but they were sorta kinda around until I was eleven or twelve. Practically raised myself… Even when they were there I was raisin’ myself.” Reno laughed softly. “That’s why I’m such a fuckin' disaster.”

Rude forced a small laugh and smile. “You’re not a disaster.” He disagreed, running some of Reno’s damp hair between his fingers again. “You’re a leader. You’re independent, resourceful… For raising yourself when you shouldn’t have had to, you did a good job.”

Reno scoffed, shaking his head, then closing his eyes.

Frowning as he watched his partner, Rude thought about the younger man’s comments more. He wondered if Reno was so quick and such a good fighter because he grew up on the streets. Even when they’d first been assigned to work together many years ago, Reno was damn good at his job. Rude remembered being surprised at just how capable the smaller man was.

With furrowed brows, but with his eyes still closed, Reno spoke up again. “You ever kill anyone before you were a Turk?” He wondered, his words somewhat slurred.

Rude shook his head. “No. Did you?” He frowned.

Reno shrugged. “Don’t think so. I beat the shit outta some guy once, but I don’t think he died.”

“Why’d you do that?” Rude wondered.

Reno smiled slightly and shrugged. “He tried to beat me up… It was when I was like fourteen. He tried to attack me, so I beat him up first. He was gonna fuckin’ steal my shit, maybe kill me. I had to.”

Rude nodded. That made sense. Reno was on his own before he was a Turk, and it made sense that he taught himself to fight back since his parents weren’t around.

“I don’t think he died…” Reno said again. “But for a long time, I was so worried about it… I went back to where we fought the next day. He wasn’t there. No one in town was talking about a dead guy being found in the alley or anything… I didn’t know who he was, so I couldn’t really ask around, see if anyone knew him, see if he was okay… It was funny, because I was so worried, like feelin’ like if I actually killed someone - even in self-defense - that it’d be the end of the world… Now I kill people all the time.”

Rude swallowed as he looked down at Reno. A sort of calmness had washed over the younger man’s features, like he was more at peace about all of his worries now. “I wouldn’t say we kill people all the time…” Rude noted. They didn’t just murder people left and right. There was a method to it, and it was a last resort.

“Well, think about back before you were a Turk… if you time-traveled back there, and told yourself it would be normal one day to have killed two or three people in a week, or in a month, or whatever… That’s a lot. It’s a lot to kill anyone. It was once.” Reno shrugged.

Rude nodded. That made sense. It was a big deal to kill someone. He had just gotten used to taking people out who were problems, seeing them as a job, a nuisance… but even a criminal whose death would be a relief to many was still a person, and once upon a time Rude would have been shocked to know his future self would be killing people for any reason.

“Reno… If you’re bothered by this, we can talk to Tseng-” Rude offered.

Reno shook his head. “No. It’s okay. Just sometimes I get to thinking about things too much… But you’re right. What we do is necessary. An’ a lot of the people who die during it fuckin’ suck anyway. Not like they didn’t get fair warning to knock off their bullshit half the time.”

Rude smiled slightly and exhaled a small breath. He couldn’t claim he himself hadn’t ever had similar thoughts in the past, wondering if certain people they killed really had to die, wondering about their families. Even the bad people might have kids, spouses, sisters, brothers… 

Cocking his head to the side as he narrowed his eyes, Rude looked down at Reno. The younger man always looked so innocent when he was asleep - or when he was close to sleep, eyes closed, quiet for once… Rude couldn’t help but to think of the Turks when he excused his own immoral actions on the basis of the people who got hurt by them being necessary casualties.

It would be easy to argue that Reno and Rude did enough bad things to be considered bad people. In the eyes of many, the Turks were villains, immoral, even evil... Did that mean it’d be fine if someone killed them? If someone came across Reno, decided he was ‘bad’ and thus deserved to die… Rude would be heartbroken if someone ever hurt his friend.

It was strange to hear such doubt from his partner after everything they’d been through together. Reno was so cocky and self-assured on a normal day. Rude wouldn’t have ever really speculated that Reno was bothered by the things they did.

Yes, Rude thought about the people he had played a part in killing, second-guessing if the deed was really necessary, if they could have solved whatever the issue was any other way… It was in the back of his mind all the time. But he didn’t realize Reno gave a shit about it too. 

Maybe that just showed that the job hadn’t turned them into complete sociopaths just yet. They still had morals, even if they sometimes did immortal things. Recognizing it alone wasn’t redemption, but perhaps it was a start. Maybe one day Rude could get himself and Reno away from this line of work. Maybe one day they could do something that helped people instead…

Reno probably wouldn’t admit this when sober, but he did care about people. He didn’t enjoy hurting people, killing people… He did what he had to, and if the person pissed him off in the process, he might get a laugh out of beating their ass… but he didn’t want to end lives, not if he didn’t have to… Even Reno had a conscience. 

Reno shifted slightly and let out a soft groan when Rude placed his hand lightly against his cheek. “Wh’ time is it?” Reno wondered, his voice low, slurred, sleepy.

Rude smiled. “After three in the morning.” He whispered back. “You feeling better now?”

“Mm hm.” Reno mumbled.

“Good. Try to get some sleep.” Rude offered. At least one of them could, and Reno was going to need it considering the hang-over he’d likely have in the morning.

Rude ran his fingers carefully through some of Reno’s hair. It was almost dry now - the shorter parts at least. It was soft, smooth. He looked much more peaceful now snuggled under the blanket, his head placed gently on the pillow on top of Rude’s lap. Rude wasn’t sure he’d ever seen Reno looking so comfortable, so still and silent.

“You’re a good person, Reno.” Rude whispered, unsure if he really hoped Reno would hear it or not. Maybe the younger man didn’t believe it about himself, but Rude did.

Their circumstances were tricky right now, but they did their best. From here, they could try to spare whoever they could… but in the end, they were still Turks. They still had jobs to do. Rude knew as well as anyone that working for someone else meant following their rules before his own sometimes.

xxxxxx

**Author's Note:**

> Stay tuned for the dramatic conclusion to my Reno and Rude story "Loose Ends." The next story is titled "Day Off" and it follows Reno and Rude to Wutai where they're spending a relaxing day off - until receiving news that Don Corneo was spotted in the area, and being given orders to take him out once and for all.


End file.
